If you’re into male chastity, odds are, you’ve heard the words “ruined orgasm” before. Perhaps it was as the mysterious title of an intriguingly hot new porn video on your favorite site. Or maybe it was mentioned by a veteran chastity practitioner on a forum dedicated to sharing stories.
But just what is a ruined orgasm?
A ruined orgasm is a male orgasm in which all stimulation is stopped just as ejaculation begins. This of course means no stroking of or touching the penis. It can also include ceasing stimulation of the prostate, testicles, nipples or any other erogenous zones.
While edging involves stopping stimulation just before ejaculation, a ruined orgasm pushes it just that little bit further, not stopping until he actually begins to release. The result is that that semen dribbles down the penis, “leaking” out rather than “spurting”.
What makes a ruined orgasm so unique? The man will release semen but will not experience any of the pleasurable sensations associated with a traditional or “full” orgasm. Despite having orgasmed, he will find himself still horny and frustrated – and, in many cases, still hard.
What Does a Ruined Orgasm Do for Him?
When a man’s orgasm is ruined, fluid (semen) is released from his prostate gland as usual, but he does not experience the muscle contractions that cause the semen to “spurt” during a full orgasm.
As a result, his brain does not release any of the hormones associated with the post-orgasmic “afterglow,” such as prolactin and oxytocin. Dopamine levels remain elevated throughout his body. Instead of feeling sluggish and relaxed, he remains aroused and frustrated.
(For a more in-depth look at how chastity affects the dopamine and prolactin levels in the male body, check out our comprehensive male chastity guide here.)
For him, a ruined orgasm can be an extremely frustrating experience, especially if he has been caged for a long period of time and waiting desperately for release.
Some men enjoy ruined orgasms, feeling that they intensify the teasing and denial elements of an enforced chastity relationships. (Some even want more.) Others dislike them, and would do anything in their power to earn a full orgasm rather than a ruined one.
Keyholders, take some time to learn how your caged man feels about being ruined to find the best way to work them into your chastity dynamic. Are they a reward? A punishment? A bit of both? Something to surprise him with so he doesn’t become complacent always getting to orgasm when you promise him he will?
Experiment and find out what works for you!
Why Keyholders Love to Ruin
By this point, keyholders might be thinking – okay, this ruined orgasm thing sounds difficult. I have to pay extra attention to his cock to make sure I (or he) stops touching at just the right moment. It might even take several rounds of practice to get it just right. But what do I get out of it?
Ruining a man’s orgasm produces a number of benefits for his keyholder. He stays horny, meaning sexual play can extend longer. You can keep teasing him, or he can take a break and please you – whichever you prefer!
He might still be hard – ready to give you an intense post-ruination penetration. Some men even report that having several ruined orgasms over a period of time shortens their refractory period, eliminating that tedious break between sexy sessions.
And if you’re feeling kind and decide to give him another chance, he can still experience a full release even after being ruined – yes, ruining is the number one way to achieve that beautiful moment once thought to be merely legend, the multiple male orgasm!
But What if Ruined Orgasms Aren’t for Me?
Sure, ruined orgasms are often associated with male chastity. But that doesn’t mean that every couple who practices enforced chastity has to utilize them. There are plenty of great and unique ways to make a man release.
If ruining isn’t your thing, try nipple/testicle stimulation or a prostate massage (also called “milking”). Prostate milking has also been known to produce a similar orgasm to the ruined one - “dribbling” or “leaking” release of semen rather than the traditional “spurt,”. Check out our chastity play ideas for lots of other ways to have fun with his orgasm!